Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. – Ephesians 5:25-30
It seems like we hear all the time that “Wives should submit to their husbands” but very few people quote the husbands responsibility over their wives. The verses above, especially vs 26 is key. The word of Christ cleanses the church and our words should do the same for our wives.
I am not a marriage expert but I have been married for 26 years. Husbands we have to fully realize that our words have power. We can speak words that build up our wives or words that tear them down. God’s word is clear that we are to speak words of life, words that clean and words that heal.
To speak words that cleanse:
Love your wife as Jesus loves his church. Lay down your life for your wife.
- As I give my life for her I find the peace of living out my calling as a husband.
- I give my life, but I gain so much more in return.
Remember your wedding vows.
Think before you speak – Yeah I know it has become a cliche’ but it still holds true.
- Do not speak out of anger.
- When you speak, speak with boldness.
Be proactive and intentional – do not leave your marriage up for chance.
- Speak positive words over your wife each and every day.
- Do not even allow yourself to think negatively about your wife.
- Be thankful – be sure you always recognize what she does as a wife and a mother.
- Be consistent.
- Write notes on occasion.
- May a day never pass where you do not tell your wife you love her. (Tweet This)
- Do not let a day pass where you do not pray for your wife. (Tweet This)
- Ask for forgiveness when you fail.
- Expect nothing in return.
- Be positive no matter what circumstances you may be going through.
- Do not try and manipulate a response from your wife.
Our words have power, so choose to build up and encourage your wife each and every day. Just like the words of Christ let your words bring life. Pray for the Holy Spirit to guide you and give you the strength to be the husband God has called you to.
If you are having to deal with a negative marriage, don’t give up and don’t try and go it alone. Be tenacious over your marriage no matter what. Reach out to guys whose marriages are strong and who you can trust. Find those seasoned couples who can help you along. Seek out counseling if needed. God has called you to have strong marriage.
Let your words be cleaning words.
Your voice is important; I would love to hear from you.
What will you do today to speak cleansing words over your wife?